I think it. I thought that it would be really boring with him just sitting there. I mean, it is really hard to tell any story in three minutes. But what I like best was the meaning behind him walking up the stairs. Like he was always taking it one step at a time, upward.
The step thing is powerful. Could you intersperse the pictures of him getting married and having a son with him walking up the stairs? You could also cut into the stair walking with what happened to him. Instead of having him just sit there at the beginning. I don't know if I like the list popping up while he is speaking. What about the list as he walks up the stairs? End it with a short cut of him saying something profound during his interview. Do you need to ask him a question? Or can it just be implied. You've got a great story here. It needs to melt hearts, and make people want to be better. You have captured that to an extent. Go further with it! Again the stair analaogy is great...dig deeper on that level. I am so proud of you! You WILL influence many people on this earth, because of your goodness. Tweak it a little bit..........or ignore your hopelessley cluless mother. I will still love you.
PS If I change to my gmail account after having written all of this I will loose it. So it is written on your dad's account cause he was logged on at the time.
I just stumbled upon this, I don't know you but thought I'd offer my view anyways. I don't like the list. I found it really distracting. I'm guessing you originally did it to make us see exactly what injuries he had to overcome. So if you are still going to keep it in the film, I agree with Mark that maybe when he's going up the stairs is the right time for that. While it's nice to see that he now is married and happy, I'm not sure what that has to do with his recovery. You show the pictures of him and his wife and son, but who's to say if he never made it out of the wheelchair he wouldn't be married with a child. It just seems like the real story here is that he took six long years to walk again, six long years of brutal P.T. And then to show just the pictures of him with his family, it kinda takes away from that for me. If there were pictures of him in his wheelchair,in the hospital after his accident, in P.T. I think that would make more sense to me. But maybe I missed the reasoning in the pictures you selected. Lastly, it's really odd to have this quiet guy talking, then all the sudden hear your voice is kinda startling. I think you could just have him say something like "The one thing I would want people to take away from this...." and then continue with what he said in the video. I think you did really well in having him just sit there in the beginning. Because at least I thought, wow this guy was just out doing something he's probably done a million times before and now he can't walk. It's really powerful to then see him not only walking but going up those stairs.
5 comments:
I think it. I thought that it would be really boring with him just sitting there.
I mean, it is really hard to tell any story in three minutes. But what I like best was the meaning behind him walking up the stairs. Like he was always taking it one step at a time, upward.
The step thing is powerful. Could you intersperse the pictures of him getting married and having a son with him walking up the stairs? You could also cut into the stair walking with what happened to him. Instead of having him just sit there at the beginning. I don't know if I like the list popping up while he is speaking. What about the list as he walks up the stairs? End it with a short cut of him saying something profound during his interview. Do you need to ask him a question? Or can it just be implied. You've got a great story here. It needs to melt hearts, and make people want to be better. You have captured that to an extent. Go further with it! Again the stair analaogy is great...dig deeper on that level. I am so proud of you! You WILL influence many people on this earth, because of your goodness. Tweak it a little bit..........or ignore your hopelessley cluless mother. I will still love you.
PS If I change to my gmail account after having written all of this I will loose it. So it is written on your dad's account cause he was logged on at the time.
I just stumbled upon this, I don't know you but thought I'd offer my view anyways.
I don't like the list. I found it really distracting. I'm guessing you originally did it to make us see exactly what injuries he had to overcome. So if you are still going to keep it in the film, I agree with Mark that maybe when he's going up the stairs is the right time for that.
While it's nice to see that he now is married and happy, I'm not sure what that has to do with his recovery. You show the pictures of him and his wife and son, but who's to say if he never made it out of the wheelchair he wouldn't be married with a child. It just seems like the real story here is that he took six long years to walk again, six long years of brutal P.T. And then to show just the pictures of him with his family, it kinda takes away from that for me. If there were pictures of him in his wheelchair,in the hospital after his accident, in P.T. I think that would make more sense to me. But maybe I missed the reasoning in the pictures you selected.
Lastly, it's really odd to have this quiet guy talking, then all the sudden hear your voice is kinda startling. I think you could just have him say something like "The one thing I would want people to take away from this...." and then continue with what he said in the video.
I think you did really well in having him just sit there in the beginning. Because at least I thought, wow this guy was just out doing something he's probably done a million times before and now he can't walk. It's really powerful to then see him not only walking but going up those stairs.
Looks great, Andy! Good luck with getting accepted.
Hey! Wendy used my account!
I liked it. I even liked the list. It made me count up the things that he had to go through and realize it was not some minor accident.
Good Luck!!
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